After The Suffering There Is Joy (Part 2)

My life was turned upside down; I had reached a point of being oblivious to everything going on around me. My son's family was growing, the number of my beautiful grandchildren were increasing, and for a short few hours a week I had times when I could concentrate on being a grandmother and enjoy my grandchildren.

Each time I was presented with the joy of new life, again, my mind would be full of thoughts of my daughter and her addiction. I was her mother, I was supposed to be able to fix things. Well, I soon learned that this is one thing you can't fix, alone!

With the love, wisdom, and support of my husband, we decided that we had to do something about this horrific situation before it killed one of us. Off we went to a drug centre seeking help and advice, they were very helpful and showed us some of the drugs to lookout for etc: We tried everywhere and everything to help our daughter recover, nothing seemed to work, so I decided to pray. Prayer is something that my mother always believed in and I hadn't been consistent with it for a long time, although it is the only thing I hadn't really tried except for the occasional Oh God help us!

In 1995 (My mum had not longed passed away) I was talking to a friend one day about how much my mother loved Our Lady and how I felt a little guilty of not attending church with her very often, although I was virtually none practicing I did always believe in God.

Mary and Paul started telling us about their experience in Medjugorje,

and how Our Lady, the Mother of God was still appearing there. Mary did most of the talking and she was explaining about the peace and joy they had both felt, not only while they were there but also since their return, (I needed some of this) right there and then I felt this longing to go and maybe I could feel the way they did. Both her and her husband along with other pilgrims had visited a place called The Cenacolo, " What's a Cenacolo, I asked" (I thought this has a strange sounding name ) "Oh she said, quite casually, where drug addicts go to recover"

Well you could have blown me over because she didn't even know about my daughters addiction.

I asked many questions about it, how do you get there? What, do you have to do while you're there etc? By the time we finished talking I think she guessed, but never tried to intrude on my thoughts.

I was desperate, I prayed (in the best way I knew how,) that I would one day get there to seek help and to visit this special place. I was also curious about the Cenacolo, but, I really did want to go because I was interested in the fact that The Mother of God was there, and maybe if I learned how to pray properly she would help save my daughters life.

A few months passed and low and behold the opportunity arose where I was able to visit Medjugorje. I could not believe it! My friend Mary told me that there was another Pilgrimage in September and that her and her husband were going again and would we like to join them. We could only afford for one of us to go, so, here I was booking to go to this special place, never, did I realize at the time, it is Our Lady that invites us there. September came, and off I went not knowing what to expect but, instantly feeling I belonged.

When I arrived in Medjugorje it was a lovely feeling, yet I somehow sensed that I was here to learn. There was a kind young man named Peter who seemed to know everything and had the most wonderful patience. I was drawn to him because he had this amazing faith, I had never witnessed anything like this before, and on one particular occasion I remember saying to him "I will never get to grips with the Rosary," I cannot remember it, he very kindly assured me and gently said "yes you will, I was like that twelve months ago".

I went to visit the Cenacolo community, and, with my secret tucked away firmly in my heart and mind, I prayed that one day my daughter would at least visit this special place, At that time I didn't pin any hopes of my daughter ever entering the Cenacolo because it just appeared to be for boys.